This Is Not Happening
TINHP features comics telling true and hilarious stories that fit each show’s chosen theme.
Ari Shaffir hosts.
Kyle Kinane: Kyle is originally from Addison, Illinois, and has been performing for ten years. He has been seen on NBC’s Last Call With Carson Daly, and the BBC’s The World Stands Up. He has performed in the Aspen, Los Ageles, Vancouver, DC, and Leicester (UK) comedy festivals. Now residing in Los Angeles, he is a regular at the Hollywood Improv and UCB theater. He’ll have you know he was rated #5 in the Top 10 Emerging Comedians list on AskMen.com. Check Kinane out on YouTube if you're ready for "a bleak, misanthropic Ernest Hemingway look-alike with a penchant for suicide jokes," as one British media outlet described him. But they're, uh, the happy kind of suicide jokes. Honest.
Ari Shaffir: Standup comedian and actor Ari Shaffir describes his comedy as a puppet show, but way filthier and without the puppets. He was a featured standup on the HBO comedy series Down and Dirty with Jim Norton and performed at the Just for Laughs Comedy Festival in Montreal and Toronto, the San Francisco SketchFest, and the Bridgetown Comedy Festival in Portland. Shaffir’s satirical shorts “The Amazing Racist” for National Lampoon went viral on the Internet with millions of views. Additionally, he has appeared on TBS’s Conan, Comedy Central’s Jon Benjamin Has A Van, ESPN Classic’s Cheap Seats, and dozens of national commercials. Ari’s podcast is called The Skeptic Tank and he is a regular guest on the Joe Rogan Experience podcast.
Shaffir resides in Los Angeles where he is a regular at The Comedy Store, The Improv and The Laugh Factory. He also headlines around the country and frequently tours with Joe Rogan.
Bryan Callen: Bryan Callen
After spending the first 14 years of his life overseas in countries like India, Pakistan, Greece and Lebanon, Callen finally moved to the USA. He went to high school in Massachusetts and earned his BA in History at American University in Washington D.C. Callen made his television debut as a series regular on Mad TV, which also served as his breakthrough. He has appeared on several television series including In Plain Sight, Californication, Up All Night, Entourage, Sex and the City, Fat Actress, 7th Heaven, Stacked, King of Queens, Las Vegas, Significant Others, West Wing, CSI, Law and Order: SVU, NYPD Blue, Suddenly Susan, Frasier, and News Radio. He also appears regularly as Bilson, Neil Patrick Harris’ boss, in How I Met Your Mother. In addition, Callen has appeared in such feature films as My Man Is a Loser, About Last Night, The Hangover, The Hangover 2, The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard, Old School, Bad Santa and Scary Movie 4. Callen has performed stand up comedy on several TV shows including Comedy Central’s Live At Gotham and CBS’s The Late Show With David Letterman.
Ray Moheet & Melissa Verdugo
Greg Fitzsimmons: Mixing an incisive wit with scathing sarcasm, Greg Fitzsimmons has achieved success as a stand-up, Emmy Award winning writer and host on both radio and TV. A regular with David Letterman, Conan O’Brien, Jimmy Kimmel, and Jay Leno, Greg has made more than 50 visits to “The Howard Stern Show”. He also hosts “The Greg Fitzsimmons Show,” on Sirius XM’s "Howard 101” and twice a week puts out the hugely popular “FitzDog Radio” Podcast.
Greg hosts a series on The Speed Channel called “Pumped” and is a frequent panelist on “Chelsea Lately”. His 2011 book, Dear Mrs. Fitzsimmons, climbed the best-seller charts and garnered outstanding reviews from NPR and Vanity Fair. Greg is taping a new One-Hour standup special this summer.
Greg spent five years as a panelist on VH1’s “Best Week Ever”. He has two Half-Hour Specials on Comedy Central, and in 2008 Greg made his entire family proud hosting the 25th Annual "AVN Adult Movie Awards" on Showtime.
Writing credits include HBO’s “Lucky Louie”, "Cedric the Entertainer Presents," "Politically Incorrect w/ Bill Maher", "The Man Show” and many others. On his mantle beside the four Daytime Emmys he won as a writer and producer on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" sit “The Jury Award for Best Comedian” from The HBO Comedy Arts Festival and a Cable Ace Award for the MTV game show he hosted called "Idiot Savants”.
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Sean Patton: My name is Sean Patton. I am Comedian based in New York and Los Angeles by way of New Orleans. I cut my teeth doing standup in the Crescent city and since have performed at Caroline's, The Comedy Cellar, Gotham, The Improv, UCBNY, UCBLA, The Melbourne International comedy festival (2011), The Montreal Just for Laughs comedy festival (2008, 2010), and many other clubs around the US and Canada.
I made my Basic Cable debut on Comedy Central's "Live at Gotham" (2009) and my Network TV debut on "Late night with Jimmy Fallon" (2010). I also recently appeared on "Conan" (2011).
I love doing what I do. Some of you will love it too (thanks!), but some of you will not (thanks for coming) My big plans for the future are to continue sharing my comedy with as many people as possible and to one day fall in love with You. Yes, You, the person reading this bio right now. Don't worry about breaking my heart because I plan on turning the experience into material anyway. Later!
Joey Coco Diaz: Sometimes it takes a huge movie role or a part in a popular television series to put a stand-up comedian on the radar; with Joey Coco Diaz it was a #1 comedy album on iTunes and Billboard. Joey has appeared in numerous films and television shows but his storytelling on the extremely popular podcast, “The Joe Rogan Experience” really showcased one of the funniest comedians working today.
Joey started his comedy career in Denver, after serving a short stint at a correctional facility, where he realized he could actually make people laugh. After his release, Joey gave it a try in a real comedy club, and that was it!
His R-rated outlook on life will get you howling in your seats but that’s what a good comedian is supposed to do. What makes Joey special is his ability to tell a story so that regardless of the subject matter, you’re still laughing. Whether it’s lighting a hooker’s wig on fire, or attacking a nun in the 5th grade, you’ll be cheering for him.
Joey is also hitting big strides in Hollywood as a character actor. You’ll see him in a recurring role on ABC’s “General Hospital,” as well as on episodes of “Children’s Hospital,” “The Mentalist,” and “Suppah Ninja’s.” The big screen is no stranger either; he’ll soon be seen in the movies ‘The Dog That Saved Halloween” and “Beach Shark Attack.” Other films he’s appeared in include “Spiderman 2,” “Taxi” and “Analyze That” but the film in which Joey stole your heart was the remake of “The Longest Yard.”
His raw style of stand-up comedy has appeared on a “secret stash” episode of Gabriel Iglesias’ “Stand Up Revolution” on Comedy Central and Showtime’s “Payaso Comedy Slam.”
Joey is a regular cast member on the #1 Comedy show on iTunes, “The Joe Rogan Experience.” His own podcast, “Beauty and Da Beast,” co-hosted by comedian Felicia Michaels, has also been in the top 10 on iTunes.